"I don't know who I am."
That's how people in transition usually sum up how they feel. Lawyers who had depended on their work to have an identity usually feel especially dismal when there could be change. Or the change has already happened. Those upheavals range from a stealth layoff to being forced into early retirement.
But what would be more accurate and what would make moving forward less painful is if they noted "I need a new story."
We are the stories we tell about ourselves.
Both professionally and personally.
Way back when in a less chaotic era we used to call that the "elevator speech." In a sentence or two it summed up what we were about. If it concerned our professional identity, it could help our career. For instance, "I'm Joe and I help big companies sell a lot of products."
In transition, that identity, once so solid, is shifting. In the interim and then longer term, folks can gain control of the process if they put together a fresh narrative. That tells the world where they are in their careers and personal lives. More importantly, it delivers the message to themselves that they are in-charge.
That's especially needed in what Bruce Feiler, author of "Life Is in the Transitions," has called "lifequakes" or seismic shifts. As MarketWatch reports, Feiler anticipates lifequakes to increase in number and intensity.
So, as folks sense a lifequake coming to rattle their lives to the core, a multi-dimensional tool could be conjuring up a new story.
The partner at a law firm gets it: The firm wants him out. He isn't bringing in enough new business or billing enough hours. The way to emotionally, socially, and professionally manage that experience is to capture it in a story that moves the process forward. An example? "I'm reviewing what could be Next. This is the first time in 30 years I looked up from my desk."
A former star in public relations contacted me for a complimentary consultation on her career. She wanted another one. So typical she framed that in the narrative embedded in the past, in who she used to be. "At Corporation X, the world knew my name. I made a lot of money. The media quoted me."
To have a shot at a Next, she had to extricate the story from the past to possibility. During four coaching sessions, she came to manage this lifequake with the story "I fix brands. That could be your personal or social brand. Or the brand of, say, Uber." That got people interested. Even before she had fully established her communications boutique she had business.
In COVID-19, it's the rare professional, parent or retired who isn't being rattled by a lifequake.
How to start on the new story?
Accept that what was is no longer. Then be ready to take the first few steps. Get those down in one or two sentences. Let language take charge. It's not what is happening. It's how people manage that whatever. Christians came up with the narrative of how the word was made flesh.
Coaching, lecturing, and writing/ghostwriting thought leadership content on human resources and careers.
For individual coaching – sliding scale fees. Complimentary initial consultation. The special area of expertise is the displaced over-50 professional. Please contact Jane Genova janegenova374@gmail.com.