They are hyperfocused on closing the sale. Consequently, they are not there. They are not present for the all-important connection with the prospect. The latter experiences the pitch as "off." And, you bet, they are scared off.
This is the tragedy of trying too hard. And that's almost exactly how failures sum up the situation: I tried so hard. Sure they did. And that was the problem.
The phenomenon has been documented in terms of loneliness. Researcher Megan L. Knowles found out that lonely people know the rules of the interaction game. Their emotional intelligence is high. It's when the rubber meets the road that they can't perform. They are so hyperfocused on succeeding that they blow it. That study is published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin.
Effective rainmakers don't try too hard. In fact, it often seems they are not trying to sell at all. Instead, they present themselves as a useful resource for the prospect. The attitude is: I'm here if you need me. There is no carnival-barker hard sell.
How to stop trying so hard? The root problem is anxiety.
Siphon off a lot of that through shifting the attention from yourself to genuine caring about the other guy. That's the magic of self forgetting.
Mindfulness can also be useful.
Ask for feedback from those you trust on how you can come across as more relaxed. Sometimes that's as simple as wearing an outfit you consider lucky. Never rule out voodoo.
In a marketplace glutted with talent, it's easy to default into angst. But it's a dark place no professional can afford to be - literally.